Thursday, January 21, 2010

You. And Me.

This has honestly been a long time coming, really, and I've tried a couple of different ways to do this, and haven't really settled on anything (big surprise there, huh?) and figured that I would finally just sit down and write it. Things kind of have a habit turning out better when I do that, instead of really planning it. Though planning works too, but...Wow...Digression, much, Louise? Sorry, it's been a bit of...week, almost. Yeah. It's been a week.

Anyway, if you haven't guessed, I've made it back to campus. My room currently looks like the Midwest after an F-3, but the day after tomorrow is Saturday, and I can take as much time then as I need to and get unpacked and settled back in officially. Also, my rug really needs to be vacuumed.

Sometimes I really wonder why it is that I do the things that I do. I thought a little about this last night, coming back from seeing Em (and getting my Chem book back from Julie since I have reading and homework problems to do for tomorrow morning) and remembered that my Giants blanket (borrowed from off of my parents bed because my room up here gets cold) was still in the front seat of my Oldsmobile. So, I walked the length of JPR to the parking lot, and walked around the back end of a giant Cadillac, and tried to look as suave and cool as I usually do when I unlock my car. And dropped a few things, and hit my forehead on the top of the door casing, and everything was just great. And I looked around the parking lot, and yes, indeed, my car is still the oldest and most worn-in and well-loved looking one there. The hood is red with gray where the paint's worn off, and to me, in the light of the street lamp, he's beautiful.

The guy in the Cadillac probably thought I was a moron of epic proportions, but then again, so does my Focus, so that's really no big deal.

And it almost makes you ask yourself: What's a girl in an Oldsmobile doing at a school with a bunch of Cadillacs, Audis, Lexus, and 2010 Hondas parked around her?

The answer: She's getting an education.

That's the common denominator of all of us here is that we're getting an education. I can't say that we'll all be in debt up to our eyeballs, but we're all here to go to class and learn something. Though some might just be here for the booze on the weekends and the sports teams, most of us are here because we want to expand our horizons and this place was the best fit for us.

And it's tough academically. There's no question of that. I'm a Chemistry major who's currently enrolled in a bi-disciplinary class titled Two Cities: New York and Toronto, a combination of economics and sociology/urban studies. I'm a Chemist. Are you pickin' up what I'm puttin' down? Even better - I'm in there with a bunch of native New Yorkers (from the city) and people from around the Tri-State area, too. NYC is home to them. It's also its own entity and personality, and can be a damn scary place after dark when you don't have a ride across the GW Bridge, but it's also a beautiful place, too. And because it's a city with a financial district that does world business, and a business district that might well be moving toward global domination, the cost of living is steeper there than it is here.

As evidenced by the native that I sat next to in class today who had the University of Virginia logo (complete with crossed swords) embroidered on his pants. Which is one of those prep things that people do at this college, and that quite frankly, I don't see the point of. Do I honestly look like the type of person to walk around with embroidered ducks plastered all over my rear end? It's big enough as it is, thanks so much. It doesn't need a flashing sign that screams LOOK AT ME!!!

And this, all of this, all of who I am, is because I am from the country. I drive a car not because it's the newest and the best, but because I need a vehicle to get back and forth to work in the summer and my placement here at college, and Fred has four wheels, a motor, and some semblance of heat in the winter. He gets me from point A to point B and everywhere in between, and that's okay with me. My favorite shirt in my closet (well...two of them, actually) are my plaid button-ups. The one is red, and made for a woman, and the other is a green one from the mens' department at Wal-Mart that I sleep in because it's nice and warm. I have sneakers, one pair of heels that I wear when I absolutely have to (I wear my Converse when I'm at work, with my black pants, because it's comfortable) and I love jeans and t-shirts. I love layers and vests (I have a new blue plaid one and a black one) and, quite honestly, material things don't matter much to me. I don't care that I don't have the latest fashion advice straight from Paris, or that I went to a high school with only 97 kids in my graduating class, or that my grad party was underneath the white and yellow circus tent in my backyard. I'm not dirt poor, and I'm not rollin' in it, either. I'm in the middle. And I'm content to be there.

And I just found the pointy side of a push pin with my foot, under my desk.

Then again, that's me. That's what makes me different from them. I've got different priorities, and I've got them in a different list, too.

And if my Focus could get its furry ass inside the window, I might actually get something constructive accomplished this afternoon. I at least need to put my movies away, maybe my clothes. Get all my school stuff (books, etc) in the same place and have some degree of order and organization back in my life.

Also, if I crank my country music, it'll be like I never went on vacation for the rest of the floor. Welcome back and hold on.

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"The difference between life and the movies is that a script has to make sense, and life doesn't."

-Joseph L. Mankiewicz