Thursday, February 25, 2010

A Many Layered Thing

I'm well aware that it's 9:51 at night, and that I probably should be doing some of my chemistry homework (though it's due Monday, but there is still a quiz tomorrow) and I should also email my cooperating teacher and tell him that, due to the snow we are getting and will continue to get, I'm not driving out a windy, curvy, worse-plowed road than the ones that I live on to spend about twice the amount of time it takes me to get out there and risk putting my car (the only one that I have) in the ditch on the way to or from. Not happening. I'll probably leave some of that sentence out, for politically correct reasons.

So, at the moment or rather, since coming back from the martini meeting about twenty minutes ago, I've been flipping from Twitter to some blogs, checked my email a few times, and then kind of wondered, after reading Writing Well Is *Not* Enough Anymore. Damn it over at velveteenmind and the part where she mentioned trying to randomly find blogs using search engines, what would happen should I try and search for my blog without actually searching for it.

Opened a new tab. Hit the home button to bounce back to Yahoo! and then typed in sagittarius. Alrighty. There are an incredible amount of websites defining a sagittarius, and probably providing star charts with the constellation and line drawings of centaurs and whatnot, and I started flipping through the pages of results. And found a gem.

How to Date a Sagittarius.

Found, of course, at eHow where you can apparently learn to do anything that needs doing, and probably some stuff that should have been better left alone.

I clicked on it. I'm curious. How, exactly, does one go about dating a sagittarius?

Keep in mind the article is only two and a half stars out of five. Still...I'm gettin' a kick out of it. And it's a really long week so any extra excuse to smile is great.

First line: Sagittarius, the noble Centaur, makes for a compassionate and very exciting friend.

So far, so good. And not only do Sagittarius's come with actual instructions, we come difficulty ratings and a list of materials that you will need. These materials include picnic lunches and camping gear. So, let's get down to business.

Step 1: Go walking, hiking, or camping. Sagittarians tend to have lots of energy and love the outdoors.

Step 2: Invite a Sag to a political demonstration or campaign rally. Issues of justice are important to them.

Step 3: Take your Sag to a big party. They're fun-loving and usually out-going.

Step 4: Behave in a principled fashion. Sagittarians are very idealistic and will respect only those who are honest and fair.

Step 5: A Sagittarian won't appreciate a purely frivolous gift, seeing it as a waste of money which could be better spent helping someone.

Step 6: Be prepared for a fascinating time - your date may jump from a dry philosophical discussion to an intense psychological encounter.

This the part where I'm supposed to tell you that whoever wrote this hadn't met a Sagittarian in his/her life. But I can't, because, oddly, this fits. At least, this fits me. These are things that I am, things that are in my character and my personality, and it's quite interesting to see them all laid out here, in a 6 Step method. Now, is this going to work if you attempt to ask me out on a date? Probably not. Because, seriously, just ask me for coffee or something since, asking me to go to a political rally or something might make me slightly angry and I'm not really fun to be around when I'm even slightly pissed off. Also makes me snark better.

Now I've gone back to the list of stuff to look through, and found another interesting thing. Which is a look-through of the planets and how they affect a Sagittarius. Which, is quite long and I'm not really going to say anything about it other than, take a look at it here, and that, hands down, my favorite line of that whole thing is: Saturn in Sagittarius: feels safe and secure as long as it understands every situation that it's in. This is not always the most practical placement ("The house is on fire, but that's OK; I know how it started. Never mind that. Get out of the house!).

There is the general consensus that my ruling planet is Jupiter. Notice that I'm not arguing with this. Sagittarius is also a fire sign. And, oddly enough, I came across another personality trait paragraph that, pretty much, is me to a T. It's slightly frightening in a way. That can be found here.

And this, my friends, is classic Louise at her best:

Sagittarius is the traveler of the zodiac and considers every day an opportunity for another adventure. This is a cheerful, spontaneous, and idealistic individual with an exceptional sense of humor. Though there is not a malicious bone in his body, Sagittarius often suffers from foot-in-mouth syndrome, giving honest assessments where a little tact might suit the situation better. (The rest found here.)

So, out of the 50,100,000 search results for the word sagittarius, I didn't have enough patience to sit through there and search until I found the link for my blog.

But if you type in wandering sagittarius then I'm the first to pop up out of 430,000 results. Which makes me giggle about as much as the steps to landing me as a date does, as mentioned previously.

And now, I really must go do some homework and get to sleep, and hell, I might even take something for the cold that I'm trying to incubate. Hope this made you giggle - I know it made me chuckle.

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"The difference between life and the movies is that a script has to make sense, and life doesn't."

-Joseph L. Mankiewicz