Friday, February 5, 2010

The Entity Known as Fat Pants

I will admit that I am, on occasion, courageous, fearless (to a degree) and confident of myself and the way that I present that to the world. By no means does this imply that I have complete and total body peace with myself (something we all struggle with at times, some more than others) but, like everything in life that deals at some point with emotions and such things, I have my good days and my bad ones.

This being said while I snack on Cinnamon Streusel Frosted Mini-Wheats because A) They're good when they're dry and B) FIBER! I have an interesting digestive system, which, being almost a year since my last medical test, I'm rather used to. And so are those who are around me at meal times.

Now, there are quite a few body parts related to the words meals, food, sustenance and they are not all good. At least, for women.

Fat Pants. Everybody's got 'em. But not everybody likes 'em.

Since I don't know many people who will willingly discuss the Entity Known as Fat Pants with complete and total strangers, I will gladly go down that road myself. Everybody has a favorite pair of jeans in their closet. There the ones that, when you feel like you're on top of the world (higher than Trump's ridiculous toupee, even) give you the extra bounce in your step, the extra confidence that shows in the set of your shoulders and the way that you carry yourself. If your a single woman, you put a little more swing in your hips. If you're a married woman, well, you still put a little more swing in your hips because it feels good. The pants make you feel great. (I highly recommend to anyone to read Ann Brashare's The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants because it is excellent and can prove several points about friendship, body image, and total kick-ass ability ingrained in all of us as women - and men, too, but mostly women.)

I actually have two favorite pairs of pants - a light wash, and a dark wash. The light wash jeans are currently on my body.

These, because they are the favorites, are the ones that it's all right to notice the hint of that lovable back fat area that we all aren't crazy about, or the sight of the love handles that we try so hard to lose. That's okay, because they hug the assets in all the right places and with my Converse on, I feel pretty damn invincible in these pants when the situation calls for it.

On the other hand, there are those days when you just feel like nothing can go right. Where, as you're looking through your closet, nothing that you want to wear is going to cover the stuff that you can't seem to get off your mind - my hips look huge; my muffin tops are going to stick out; I really like this shirt, and I want to wear it, but I don't want it to look awkward. And for the days when we feel bloated out of our mind for whatever reason, and we just don't feel like making an effort because everything just seems drawn and tired - enter the Fat Pants.

The Fat Pants. They live in the bottom of our dressers, in the backs of our closet, and for those days when we need something with a little give in a world that pushes constantly, they're just the perfect thing. These, are my Fat Pants.

Let's take a look at the tag.

52% Ramie
27% Cotton
18% Polyester
2% Spandex
1% Rayon
Made in China
Size: 14
See Reverse for Care

I bought these things at Barbara Moss, and they have some great give to them. Perfect for coming up over the muffin tops and disguising the back fat. And they're dark wash, so they hide imperfections and stains from whatever life decides to hurl my way. They're good pants. The bottoms of the legs are a little worn from where I step on them, but still, they're good pants. They're my Fat Pants. I wear these bad boys when I'm having a bad day and I need to hide.

And that's a crazy idea, isn't it? Hiding in our clothes. Crazy. Laying on sweatshirts and other shapeless pieces because we don't like the way we look, because we don't feel as good as we should in our skin. So we hide. It's crazy, isn't it? The things that people do because they want to hide their imperfections from the rest of the world because it's not okay to be the way they are. Why would somebody want to do that to themselves?

For as much as we ask that question aloud - be it to an empty dorm room or a room full of people for a common goal of gaining body peace (and peace of mind, too) - there's not one person who can readily answer that truthfully without looking and sounding like a hypocrite. Because I can guarantee that in each and every closet there is a pair of pants or some other form of clothing designed for the specific purpose of hiding.

I know many a confident, courageous woman. And still, we have things like Fat Pants.

So, I have another dare for you. I dare you, each and every one of you reading this, I dare you that each morning, when you stand at your closet and your dresser, deciding what to wear for the day, when you pick up an item of clothing, instead of saying what's wrong or ugly with it on your body, remind yourself of why you bought it. Did you buy it because it was your favorite color? Did you buy it because it showcased you in a way that made you stand a little straighter? Like you wanted every eye to be on you, instead of trying to blend into the background? Remind you, as you stand there, of the ways that you are beautiful and unique. Remind yourself of the way that your body curves, since, if it didn't...well, you'd probably resemble a man. And, honestly, no self-respecting woman really wants to overtly resemble a man any more than they have to.

We are made individually different. And for that, we are beautiful. So put the Fat Pants back in the closet, stand up straight, stare the world in the eye, and say, Now what?

[If you really want a challenge - Leave the Fat Pants in the closet for as long as you can. Get a friend and have a contest of who can leave their hiding clothes hidden in the longest. Who knows - Go so long without finding them, and you might lose them. Be a shame, wouldn't it?]


Erin Reed said...

What about when you don't have that article of clothing, be it jeans or anything else, that makes you feel good and ready to take on the world? As close as I come is my new pair of pj pants.

Molly Louise said...

Remember how you feel when you have them on, and then think of that when you're not wearing them. Confidence is partly physical and mostly mental. Which is probably the most difficult part about it.

"The difference between life and the movies is that a script has to make sense, and life doesn't."

-Joseph L. Mankiewicz