Sometimes it's better to be blindsided. It's a little easier to take that leap when you don't exactly see it coming, and maybe, sometimes taking little steps is okay, too.
Or maybe it's just better when you can't see the bottom of what you're leaping over.
I said last time that people have baggage. And there are people we have with us that help us carry it, and help us sort through it and not just pitch it off the pier. There are those people who stand by you even when things start flying, and you're not quite sure which way is up, and which is way is the right side, and which way gets you the hell out of everything. You find out who your friends are, and you find out, really, a little more what love is kind of like.
In a way.
There's something to be said for finding out that someone sticks around just for you. It's humbling. That they stay because not only are you able to deal with their shit as well as your own, they're always a listening ear. They don't let you get away with lying to yourself (or to them) and know just the right amount of push, back off, listen, and speak to be effective.
And no matter what dumbass thing you've done, they're still here.
If it's a boy, and you're a girl, there's this little chance. I'm not classifying it under those famous four letters. It's too early for that. But there's been so much between the two - baggage from both sides, failures and triumphs from both sides, and I have mentioned baggage? One's got a matching Gucci set and the other mismatched, threadbare lumpy stuff.
And then comes the moment of truth. Try it? One's more than a little gunshy, and the other, as always, has the promise that come hell or high water, I won't hurt you because I've seen you hurt enough. I've dealt with the fallout from the other hurts. Do you trust it? Do you trust yourself?
What happens is that you go slow. You start something that's a little new, a little foreign to the both of you, and see where it goes. And as long as your happy, and you're safe, nobody else should really give a damn. Don't give it a name - a label - just let it be. See where it goes. It'll take shape of its own.
Just that first step though - that's the hardest, and it's a damn doozy. Make sure you bring your flashlight and an open mind.
2 comments:
i hear music playing in my head while reading this :)
What song?
And thank you for reading.
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